Charlton vs Mighty MLJ

Two parallel universes from two silver age comic book publishers examined ad naseum!

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Steeler Sundays: Iron Curtain Defensive Schemes

This week, Steeler Sundays lays it all out for those aspring athletes in our audience on the critical smack down that a good defense leads to a winning offense. There are various techniques a professional can employ for maximum effectiveness. While style points are garnered from a skillful technique, ultimately success is the goal of a true Steeler.

One must know the chinks in an enemy's game plan for when the game is on the line. First off, intercepting a pass and then proceeding to cram it down the other guy's throat. Known as "Bam Zing Kazeeng" or a standard Interception maneuver.

At times, the other team is more aggresssive in their play calling. To counteract this, launch a forward lateral motion, diving towards one's opponent in an imposing manner. Known as "Kapow...Kpow...Kap" or the Bull rush maneuver.




The other side may eventually gain the upper hand. If so, a particularly effective technique is a crouching position, raising one's arms up to catch your opponent off guard. Known as "Pinngg Bam" or the Swim Move.


Finally, if you find your teammate in the midst of a panic attack thinking that he's "not that good", try out this timeless little gem sure to work.

Known as the "Gum-Drop" maneuver, or simply "Slurp", this is sure to elicit plenty of "kum ba ya" in the locker room. Provided your teammate doesn't get indigestion. Like steeling, er, stealing candy from a baby!


This PSA has been brought to you by the Steelers, Sterling and Sarge.

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